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[sticky post] About me~~

Welcome to my journal!~

I mainly write fics here but I also do post my opinions and fangirl moments~~
Only personal posts about my daily life are friends-locked.
If you like fics or want to talk about Johnny's Jrs in general, feel free to PM or add me~ ^_^

Here for fanfics? Click here: Fanfiction masterlist

I decided to make an introduction post, on to it~
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[Oneshot] Wink

Title: Wink
Characters: Jesse/Hokuto
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the fic
Author's Notes: I was cleaning out my fic folder and I found this~ Written for shiritori at writetomyheart~ Enjoy~

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Planning to go for Takizawa Kabuki 2016

I tweeted about this already when I bought my tickets but... I'm going for Takizawa Kabuki this year!~ ~(^w^)~

This trip came up on a whim unlike Elisabeth which I had planned for around 6 months in advance. So apparently I got to know some time in February that my after-internship holiday lasts 2 full months (April - May) for the first time ever! And when I was asked "what do you want to do?" the first thought was travel. So I checked around for all the shows that were in this time and Takizawa Kabuki is on! After some minor hiccups and LOTS of encouragements from my friends (bless you people, you're awesome!) I'm confirmed to be going on a solo trip to Japan for 13 days to watch the show and to go sakura viewing.

It's going to be my first time travelling solo and it's regrettable that it has to be done with so little planning. I just finished my internship in March and it was hectic. In addition to working, the college also made us do assignments during the internship so some days I had to come back from work to do homework and that leaves very little time left for fandom or vacation planning. Thankfully, I have my lodging, my flight tickets, my pocket money, and show tickets all settled, so all that's left is my rail pass, which I will be getting tomorrow, and my itinerary.

I hope nothing bad will happen, since I'm reasonably careless and quite paranoid about a lot of things. And I hope this trip can make me grow as a person, to not be so worried about everything, and be able to handle situations better. 
So, starting from last week Monday I've been having quite a few bad luck episodes... And I really need to rant so I'm just gonna do it here.

It started when my friends and I were shopping for groceries after work, I left my trolley with some of our items in it at a less crowded aisle to enter the wet market section because that area is always crowded and I didn't want to block anybody. And when I came back, I realized that someone had the nerve to dump my stuff on the shelf and steal my trolley. >_> Okay, maybe I was wrong to leave it unattended. But stealing someone else's trolley with stuff in it seems pretty rude... And after that, out of my own carelessness I scraped the back of my ankle at the my house gate. @.@ And later that night, my ceiling started leaking, and my friend and I had to get up at 2am to shift my stuff out of the room and sleep in the living room. T^T

On the good side, my housemates helped call the repairman and it was fixed by the time I came back from work the next day. But I still had to spend around 3 hours cleaning the mess of dirty roof water flooding the room. My friends had to clean the other rooms too, so they couldn't help out. Oh did I mention? I had an assignment due on Fri so I ended up sleeping only 3-4 hours the next few days after that. Even so, only managed to pass it up on Sunday.

Oh yeah, and my mother met a minor accident last Saturday. She's fortunately fine, but one of her back doors is wrecked. It wasn't her fault... A truck tried to cut into her lane, and probably didn't see her. I'm so glad nothing happened to her... T^T Speaking of accidents, my friend also got hit by a motorist today. The man was very aggressive though... He frightened her into paying him for the damages and broke one of the plastic rain shields on her side window in their 'negotiation'. God, this is why I insist on not driving. This is why I'd rather stay at home if I had the luxury of choice. And that happened when she was bringing my other friend to the hospital for a checkup because she suddenly broke out in rashes and my superior was worried it was dengue fever or the zika virus.

My boss's company car also got stolen last night, and I lost my office access card at the construction site yesterday. Ugh. I think I could really use a hint of good fortune, and good long rest. All those all-nighters last week has left me fatigued. And without mood to face any other misfortune. Be safe people. Drive safe, and take care of your health. T^T 

Another Day, Another Dream

I had the weirdest dream again. This time it’s about Shirota Yuu. XDD I can’t remember where it starts so I’ll just explain the parts I remember the most.

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Letting My Heart Out

As I watch Yasui and Snowman's performance, my heart screams "I want to dance it all out like that too, express my endless emotions with fluid movement, swift swishes of my limbs, pulling and stretching all the muscles in this body." "I want to sing, in a voice full and deep as Shirota Yuu's serenade, as sweet as Kyomoto Taiga's ballads, and as melancholic as Camille Lou's 'la sentence'."

I am almost bursting at the seams with emotions you'd think only a teenager would have. Perhaps I am not the adult I wished myself to be yet. But I need to accept that. It's okay. I'm only turning 21. It's still not too late. If life were a canvas, I've only painted the little sun on the top corner I always drew as a kid. But these feelings I surpress within myself I know I shouldn't continue to bottle them up. If I had the skill, I could express it all beautifully. If I had the courage, I'd belt my heart out in song.

"If I had just 10 centimeters more of courage, where would I be right now?" such were the lyrics of a song. Such are the questions in my mind. Such things as courage, is what I yearn for right now.